


Mr. Mistoffelees and The Rum Tum Tugger Perform a Magic Trick

by Fair_Feather_Friend



Category: Cats (2019), Cats - Andrew Lloyd Webber, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats - T. S. Eliot
Genre: Cats, Implied animal abuse, M/M, Magic, no animals were harmed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-28
Updated: 2019-12-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:20:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21995137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fair_Feather_Friend/pseuds/Fair_Feather_Friend
Summary: Mr. Mistoffelees and The Rum Tum Tugger Perform a Magic Trick or  did Mr. Mistoffelees really pull seven kittens from a hat.
Relationships: Mr. Mistoffelees/Rum Tum Tugger
Comments: 8
Kudos: 153





	Mr. Mistoffelees and The Rum Tum Tugger Perform a Magic Trick

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't expect to be writing these two again but I did. I haven't seen the movie, but it was the inspiration I needed to write this. Spite is inspiration, right?

The Rum Tum Tugger had, as most did, overlooked the small black cat with the name that was bigger than he was. He'd assumed that because Mr Mistoffeles was so rarely seen that he was a quiet, timid creature, one too dull to hold any interest at all.

The Rum Tum Tugger was never wrong, except when he was. 

Mr. Mistoffeles darted from the shadows and towards the Rum Tum Tugger's den. From any other he might have considered a threat, but from such a small cat what danger was there. 

"Come!" Mr. Mistoffeles demanded, and darted off once again, expecting The Rum Tum Tugger to follow. The Rum Tum Tugger didn't appreciate being told what to do, but his curiosity got the better of his contrariness and he darted off after.

He would never have expected it to be an effort to keep up, but he had to clamber over fences that had cracks Mr. Mistoffeles just slipped through. They ran along rails, and charged through gardens, as if their lives depended on it and just as he was about to start asking questions Mr. Mistoffelese slowed to a stop. 

"I'm going to perform a magic trick, and you're to be my assistant. Be a distraction. Don't get caught." 

As if The Rum Tum Tugger needed to be told that. He bristled at the idea. There were humans ahead, a group of young ones, with the scent of the evil drink that was always best to avoid. No good came of associating with the humans that smelled like that. 

"Over here!" Mr. Mistoffelees called from the other side of the garden. Which was impossible he was right... the other cat had vanished into the shadows. "Over here!" he called from on the roof. "Over here!" 

He was but one cat in the shadows, but he sounded like many. The Rum Tum Tugger stalked closer to catch a glimpse of their prey. Three humans crowded around the thing he did not want to think about. They looked around, searching for the source of the calls.

The Rum Tum Tugger yowled his most blood-curdling yowl. A human screamed. He sang as loud as he could, a hunting song, and the humans scrambled to their feet. One picked up a stick. Good. It didn't touch the thing. 

The Rum Tum Tugger circled around, yowling loud and threatening. There humans would do what he wanted and just now he wanted them to pay attention to him. He let them catch a glimpse of him and a stick was thrown. How rude! As if he was a dog! 

He blew up his fur, making himself as impossibly as big as could be, letting them catch another glimpse, and he hissed, loudly. They all screamed.

That sound was echoed all around. A magic trick? No. The trick was happening where no one was looking, The Rum Tum Tugger was just the misdirection. 

A window opened up above. A human yelled, and the young ones scarpered, leaving that... not a thing. The Rum Tum Tugger stalked closer, wary of the humans returning, or the one up above catching sight. 

The thing didn't move... he hadn't expected it to. It would be too great a magical feat to have expected otherwise. And then, from the bushes, near the door, a tiny, plaintive mewl, and then another. 

All in all, seven tiny kittens that had tumbled from the thing. The hat. Mr. Mistoffeles was a magician and so this must be a hat, the strangest of hats for the strangest of cats. 

The Rum Tum Tugger was not ready to be a father. Before there could be even the suggestion that somehow two toms might be able to raise the kittens themselves, he grabbed one of the kittens, by their scruff, stalked to the closest door and yowled to be let in. 

The human above made human sounds, none of which were of interest, but she did step into the garden. He'd leave the human to deal with it all, this one was kind, sometimes she left out treats, and she didn't smell of dog. 

Before he could get dragged into it, The Rum Tum Tugger slunk off, his reputation intact. A small black shadow followed him. 

"Thank you for helping."

"Not long ago, this phenomenal cat, produced seven kittens, right out of a hat."


End file.
